Hello 2012!

For me to say that 2011 was a hard year would be an understatement. 2011 was filled with hurt, disappointment, sadness, loneliness, loss, grief, and anger. It will be a year that I remember as changing my life, changing my thought process, and changing who I am and who I want to be.

2011 was also filled with hope, new beginnings, new challenges, and new accomplishments. I began a new job as a fitness instructor and found that I really have a passion for the health and fitness world. I accomplished many challenges along the way to get to this point, thus proving to myself that I still have it in me to put my mind towards a goal, and work really hard to reach it.

My children continue to bless me with their smiles, hugs and kisses, endless energy, a love for others, a desire to learn, and a curiosity to try new adventures.

I have been reminded over and over through 2011 that through all of the pain, hurt, sin, and anger, that God is still next to me, wanting to help me through each and every day of my life.



For 2012, my hope is that I continue to lean on God for his strength through the rough months that may come. I pray that I will not turn towards being angry at a situation (which is so easy to do), but rather that I would embrace the challenge and know that my God is for me.

I am a strong believer that each day is what we make of it. So, I really pray that I am able to make the most of each day God has given me. To take care of my soul and my body. To exercise, to eat right, to pray, and to focus on what really matters at the end of the day. I pray that I can be thankful for what I have rather than constantly wanting more, be passionate in what I do and not take it for granted, and live in the moment instead of thinking about the future.

We were not put on this earth to worry about life, for this reason, I will work on not being full of fear but instead be full of hope and promise. Life was not promised to be easy, although, I plan to live each day to the fullest, work on not taking moments and things for granted, and loving those around me who I care for and cherish.

Innocent Crush

It all started this morning.....

"Hey Mommy, I have a new friend at school, she's in the Giraffe class." - Cooper

"Oh really? What's her name?" - Me (since I work there, I get to "spy" and find out who this friend is.)

"Her name is M (shortened of course for her real name)" - Cooper

And that was the depth of the conversation. Fast forward to this morning around 11:30 when I took some extra cookies into where C's class was, along with the Giraffe class. They were sitting there watching a Christmas movie. They could sit anywhere they wanted. I spotted Cooper sitting with some of his friends in the back. It took me a moment before I saw a girl sitting next to him. I asked one of the teachers is that was M....and it was confirmed that it was.

So, I am standing there watching and talking with the teachers a bit when I see her lift her arm and rub his back. She smiled at him and he smiled back.

"Oh my goodness!!!" I thought.....how sweet, cute, and innocent all of it was. At one point C turned around and saw me there. I asked him if that was M and he nodded his head yes and smiled a silly, possibly slightly embarrassed, smile. I of course then went to embarrass him some more by giving him a kiss and telling him "I love you." Come on, a moms gotta do what a moms gotta do when another woman comes into her son's life! :)

I then learned how C has been showing off in front of her, she has been asking him to sit next to her when they watch movies, and they say hi to each other when they see each other outside of class.

He made sure that an invitation to his Christmas party for school went home with her....he REALLY wants her there!

Oh, and for those who are concerned.....I know her parents, they are both Texas A&M Alumni....they pass the inspection! :)

Hurting Heart

I am not looking for sympathy....just needing to put this out there. There are moments, like this evening, that I miss my best friend so so much. I find myself wanting to be mad at God for taking him from me. If only I could call him right now to hear him say "It's all going to be okay." Instead, I am trying so hard to hear that from God...but the static is so so loud.

I think I do a pretty good job at putting a smile on my face and acting as if my life is going well. I've decided to tonight to let go and CRY. The flood gates are open and I am not holding back.

Bucket List

It's about time to have a Bucket List! I refuse to let life get me down....instead, I am going after it head on! This is definitely a work in progress.....

• Be apart of a flash mob
• Run a half marathon at Disney World
• Run a half marathon in Hawaii
• Be on the Amazing Race
• Go deep sea diving
• Earn more fitness instructor certifications
• Backpack thru Europe
• Volunteer for at least a month at a Haven for Hope type of place
• Witness a birth (other than my own of course)

That's a good start.....

Chance Phone Call

So my life has a lot going on right now (that's for another post), a lot that has reminded me of who I am, who I can be, and who I ought to be.

I received a phone call yesterday evening, well make that two calls from a phone number that I did not know. No voicemail was left. On any other night, I would have never even given these phone calls a second look. But last night was different. We were at Cooper's soccer party when I received the phone calls. Not knowing who it was, I assumed that it was a fellow soccer mom trying to find us. So, unlike any other day, I pressed "talk" on my phone to return the call and waited to see who would pick up. To my surprise it was not a fellow soccer mom or even a doctor's office verifying an appointment, it was a wrong number.

The following is the way the phone call went: (we will call the other person "Chance")

Me - Hi, I just received two phone calls from this number and I am not sure who is calling.
Chance - Yes, I was trying to get ahold of "wrong number." Is this her?
Me - No, but I've had a few people call looking for her for some reason.
(add in a bit of joking comments on both ends and casual conversation for a minute or two)
Chance - Well, did you by any chance apply for a teaching job with SAISD?
Me - No, but are you hiring?
Chance - Yes, we are, do you have a teaching degree?
Me - No, but I have an economics degree and would be interested in exploring my options of becoming a teacher.
Chance - Economics? I could use you as a math teacher. Would you be interested in programs such as Region 20 to get your certification?
Me - Yes, I would. Can I call you later this week to talk more about this opportunity?
Chance - Yes, that sounds great. It was great talking with you and I look forward to meeting you.
Me - Great, It was great talking with you too. I'm glad you called the wrong number!

All I can say is WOW! How crazy, awesome, random, amazing, and perfect timing is this?!?! Such a fun spirited phone call that could change some areas in my life.

And yes, I plan to meet with her the week after Thanksgiving break to explore my options.

Perspective

With so much going on within this world, our country, and our communities, I find it interesting what some people find is important.



People of other nations deal with starvation, disease, and lack education, yet are happy. They are happy with what they have, not knowing what they "could have" (in terms of other countries). Their national average of daily income per family is vastly lower than that of the USA, and yet they get by. They make due with what they have, and if they want more, they work even harder so they can afford it.

I will admit, I have not been following the "Occupy Wall Street" movement that much, well okay, more like at all. But, I have seen a few news clips here and there about it, read some posts on facebook even, and I've decided that I must be missing the point.

At what point do we, citizens of a wealthy country full of opportunities, allow ourselves to blame others for our debt, lack of money, dead end jobs, inability to have the next iPhone, etc? I was raised with the mentality to work hard to earn the money and resources to live, survive, and even be able to purchase a "want" from time to time.

Who are we to punish those who make more than us? Some how, some way, they have earned the right to make the money that they make (right, wrong or other). Rather than focusing so much time on why the wealthy are so bad, maybe time should be focused on balancing a household budget, or prioritizing a weekly schedule to allow time for a second part time job if needed, or on the poorest of poor who really don't have anywhere to turn and really could use some help to get back on their feet or a meal.

I'm not saying that no one ever deserves help or that people should go hungry if they don't have money for food. I believe there is a time and place to help those in need. What I don't understand is why some people are blaming the banks for their financial decisions and current hardships.

I have a bachelors degree and worked at a great paying job when I graduated from college. When my son was born, we made a CHOICE for me to stay at home with him. With that choice came many sacrifices from the very beginning. Eating out became a treat and luxury, instead spaghetti or even rice and beans became more of a common menu item within the house. Shopping for the latest and greatest new styles of clothing flew out the window, and frankly has not come back....I don't think it ever will. We cut out many expenses such as formula and diapers by choosing to breastfeed and cloth diaper.

Sure, it would be GREAT to have a boat to take out to the lake or actually go on a vacation, but for now, living a modest lifestyle filled with paying off student loan debts, saving money to help be prepared for those "just in case" moments, and teaching my children little lessons about smart buying choices is where I would happily be.

I won't cry that I can't have a new TV, bedroom set, or even those juicy steaks this week, because being in my financial situation has been and is my choice.

Coffee Sand

This next week, my preschool class will be exploring taste, touch, and smell. I came across an awesome recipe that I had to try out for the class. My 4 year old son seems to enjoy it, so I'm hoping that the 2 and 3 year olds do as well!

Here's what you'll need:

4 cups of used coffee grounds
2 cups cornmeal
1 cup flour
1/2 cup salt

First thing, stop by your local Starbucks coffee shop and see if they have any used coffee grounds. I went into my local Starbucks and walked out with a trash bag FULL of used coffee grounds....for FREE!!!! I actually have more than I need. If you run into this problem, place any extra grounds in your flower pots or your garden.

Okay, so now bake the coffee grounds in the oven on low heat (about 200-250 degrees) for 45 minutes. Spread the grounds out on baking sheets to allow them to evenly dry out.

Once those are finished, mix the remaining ingredients into a big bowl with the coffee grounds.

And.....that is it! Simple, easy, and inexpensive! Let the exploring begin.

The coffee sand will last a few weeks if kept in an air tight container between playtimes!

Self-less Heart

Cooper (my 4yr old son) was allowed to stay up late last night to watch the Dallas Cowboys football game. He loves staying up late while his little sister goes to bed early....this means undivided attention all goes to him and he gets fun treats such as ice cream.

So, he was all set up on his bean bag chair, ice cream, and football on tv, truly enjoying his late night. When the first set of commercials came on, I switched the TV channel over to the Weather Channel, mainly because I don't like C to watch, hear, or get scared from certain commercials. (Yes, I know...I'm very protective in certain areas.) Anyhow, back to the main topic here. The Weather Channel was showing continuing coverage of Hurricane Irene including the flooding, high winds, people being evacuated, etc. After a few commercial breaks of watching the weather channel C stated that

"Those people (the ones being hit by the hurricane) didn't have their home anymore, didn't have couches, beds, clothes, or anything and needed some help."

He then continued with

"I want to send them all of my money from my dinosaur."

After talking with him about this and how we can find ways to help those affected by the hurricane, he was very insistent on sending ALL of his money that he had saved to those who needed it. To say that my heart was smiling and I was filled with joy and a feeling of pride for my son would be an understatement. Even at 4 years old he had thought of such a simple, valuable, and selfless gesture to help those who didn't have anything.

Cooper went on to bed last night and woke up excited to take all of his money out of his dinosaur and take it to the store to count the money so that we would know how much he had collected for those affected by Irene.

This is Cooper at the coin counter preparing to drop in his coins.



The final total was $9.50. To an adult (and even me at the moment) this sounds like such a small pointless amount of money to send to those who will need hundreds of dollars fixing, painting, and rebuilding their lives. But, to a proud, selfless 4 year old, this was an "amazing amount of money," as he put it.

There are so many lessons within such a small event. My 4 year old has been saving money (random coins that he found next to his father's wallet, from the dryer, etc) in his green dinosaur for 2 years. Most kiddos would be ready to cash it in for a favorite toy or candy or happy meal as a reward. Without any prompting or mentioning on the coins that he had saved, he knew exactly where he wanted his money to go. He learned (even if he didn't intend to learn this), that it is better to give and help those who need it.

While eating lunch (a special lunch today), we were talking about how we could help even more and he said that we should save more money to send. I agreed with him. He then suggested that he talk with his friends to see if they want to send their money that they have saved. And in all honesty, I'm sure that he will probably do that the next time he sees them.

I did tell him though that I would post on here about his generosity and see if anyone else would like to join him in sending $9.50 to those in need of help that were affected by Hurricane Irene. If you are interested, please send me an email or contact me.

As a final note, I have to say that I am SO very proud of my kind hearted, gentle, caring, active, spirited 4 year old. I can only pray that he continues to grow with such a selfless heart and lifestyle.

P.S. if you know of a good organization, preferably through a church along the East Coast that has been affected by Hurricane Irene, that can help get this money to those in need, please let me know.

Let The Summer Fun Begin!!!

It's summer time! Yippee...I'm excited that both of the kids are old enough to be active and enjoy the activities that I plan for us to do.

So, here's a glimpse at what we've been up to so far. If you like any of these ideas and want to know how to join in on the fun, message me and I can send you the recipe or directions!

We have made both foamerators and home made playdoh in the microwave this week.

The kids loved the foamerators and played with them while enjoying the kiddie pool. Bubbles and foam went everywhere!

Yesterday I made playdoh in the microwave. It was SUPER easy. I have my doubts at first, but it turned out great and the kids have played with it longer than they play with regular playdoh.

Next week's crafts and fun will hopefully include painting with the foamerators and some noodle/pool fun! (A mess does not scare me!) :)

My Newest Adventure!

I have always had a desire to stay healthy, in shape, and active (probably mostly from my undiagnosed ADD). ;) I eat "fairly" well....but I DON'T diet, can't do it, I love food too much. I have found a love for running, crazy, I know but I can honestly say that training and running my first half marathon is what allowed me to really drop my pregnancy weight better than anything I had tried. And well, having 2 kids I am automatically active, but I love challenging my mind and staying busy.

About 2 months ago I decided to take a dive into a new arena of life....and become a Les Mills Body Flow Instructor. What is Body Flow you might ask. Body Flow is an athletic blend of yoga, pilates, and tai chi. It is a great blend of amazing songs, challenging poses, and relaxation for the mind. A class is approx 55 minutes long with tracks that focus on such areas as standing strength, balance, core abs and back, twists, hamstrings, and much more. I LOVE IT!!! I have been taking these classes for the past 2 and a half years. I even took it while pregnant with Aubrey and I believe that the class really helped to prepare me for succeeding in having an all natural, non medicated child birth. Okay, so as you can tell, I truly love this class.

This past weekend I spent about 30 hours in training as the first step in becoming certified to teach these classes. What a wonderful experience it has been. I have been pushed to my limit and then further. My body has worked very hard this weekend as we did more tracks than I do in a good 3 week time period! Emotionally I was challenged as I entered into an unknown this weekend with having no experience "teaching an exercise class." I found that initially I do not do well with the "unknowns" of life. When I come to a time or event where I am unsure of myself, I attempt to withdraw and become quiet and reserved. (I know, that's absolutely NOT who I am!) But, through the amazing trainer pushing use in every area that she could and the great support of the other "to be instructors", I survived the weekend!

Through this weekend, I truly found my passion again for life in general. More specifically for health and exercise of course as well. From the events of the last few months, I seem to have lost either my focus of being passionate or my passion for life all together. I am so excited and happy that I feel passionate again. I want my passion to radiate off of me and onto to those around me.

When I came home, I turned on a track song from this weekend. It was so much fun watching the kids follow me (or attempt to follow me) as I showed them what I had been doing and learning this weekend.

It is still an unknown road ahead of me as this process is still rather foreign to me, but I know that through my passion for this and with God's help and guidance, doors will open up and opportunities will arise for me to further this new adventure that I have begun!

1 Year Ago Today…..

You transitioned into a preschooler, no longer of true “toddler” status. It’s amazing to see how within one year, so much can change.

Throughout this past year, you have learned how to spell and write your full name, count to one hundred, and recognize all of your letters and numbers. You enjoy learning as if it is a fun game to win. Worksheets to you are just as fun as coloring and painting. Your love for learning is to be desired and I pray that you will always have this passion.

Last year, right after your 3rd birthday, we visited your Hematologist for the last time. I cried with joy and excitement when Dr. Patel announced that your white blood cell counts looked great and that your Neutropenia was gone. One of the main reasons as to why I cried was because 3 years prior to this day of wonderful news, you were born, on Mother’s Day Weekend (2007). This appointment took place on the Friday before Mother’s Day Weekend 3 years later….what wonderful news that my baby boy was healed and we could breathe a sigh of relief. Your body was once again producing white blood cells just as it should. Your immune system was back to full working order with no big threat of intense illnesses anymore. While there is still a part of me that wonders if your immune system will fail again or that it will come back even worse as Leukemia, I know that you are in God’s Hands. You have had two checks on your complete blood count so far, and both times your white blood cell count is the highest it has ever been! God is Amazing and Good.

Along with this healing news, you have also outgrown your bilateral bladder reflux. The test (a VCUG) was NOT enjoyable with you at this age along with the weekend to follow of convincing you that yes, in fact, you would still be able to go potty even through the (temporary) pain. Along with this great news is the news that you will never (and I mean NEVER) have to have another VCUG again!

You are still a little dare devil. You enjoy jumping on the trampoline, swinging yourself by pumping your legs, and have mastered riding your scooter….you even do tricks on it! At Christmas time Santa gave you your first ever skateboard. I’m not sure what Santa was thinking with that purchase! You can ride it sitting down, laying on it, and even standing up with your arms out “like you’re surfing”! The next item to master is a bicycle….we will also be purchasing plenty of knee and elbow pads!



You have grown to be such an independent “big boy” (as you remind me almost every day that you are no longer a baby). Park play now consists of you running off to play with the other children on the playground. I have had to learn patience and self control to not want to step in when another child is not playing nice. My “helicopter mom” status is now in full force, although I am trying to control it, I promise!

I believe that my hobby and passion for running has now passed off to you. Our morning jogs to the park, grocery store, or around the neighborhood are a lot of fun….for you while you sit comfortably in the stroller!  You are a fast runner. You love to race. In fact, you ran your first ¼ mile race in August at the Zoo. You did AWESOME! I look forward to running the race with you this next year again.

You have also begun swim lessons. Apparently you are a pro at this! Going to swim class is your first athletic type class to ever go to. You are not shy towards the instructors and have no big fear of the water. You have already held your breath while going under water and opening your eyes – and we are only 3 sessions in!

Your sister and you have become the best of friends. You love teaching her new words, showing her how to play with certain toys and how to hide and hoard other toys (when you don’t want her to play with them). You give her the best hug and kiss “night night” and love and protect her so much.

Monster trucks, McQueen and Football are some of your favorite things. It is very common within any given day to hear you talk about growing up and owning a monster truck when you are a football player for Texas A&M. Now, let’s get this clear….I have been saying “No” to you becoming a football player, but since you add in that you will play for Texas A&M, well, we may be able to discuss the possibilities of you playing football one day. Although, would you consider soccer? Just asking! 

You talk about being baptized, letting Jesus live in your heart, and going to church a lot these days. This year you seemed to fully understand the meaning of Easter and love reading about what it means to have Jesus live in your heart. I truly pray that you will continue to grow closer to God and hang onto his truth throughout life.

When I think of how amazing and loving you are, I smile. In any given day, you can bring a smile to my face, a good tear to my eye (watching you grow up), a frightening feeling when you take a chance, and a true feeling of joy to know that you are a blessing, an awesome brother, son, and friend.

This next year will be adventurous and fun. I am excited to watch you grow into an even more independent child. To start off your year as a 4 year old….you will get to chew GUM for the first time. This is definitely something that you have been looking forward to. You will hopefully start playing soccer, probably enjoy a few A&M football games (at Kyle Field), and talk more and more of going to “big kid school” (which I will then want to cry)! We will play, learn, and laugh together just as always. I pray that you continue having your soft spirit, your loving smile, and your happy heart throughout this next year.

So here’s to you Cooper James Smith; Happy 4th Birthday (May 12, 2011)!

Love,
Your Super Cool Mom!

Too Smart

I believe that Super C is too smart for his own good! He always seems to surprise me with his newest knowledge about something or how to say a certain word.

Today while driving to drop off Bleu (our lab) at the groomers, we were going through the animals. It started with something like this:

Super C ~ "If I were a dog, then I would have to go to the groomer to get a bath."
Me ~ "Yes, you are correct"
Super C ~ "If I were a horse, then I would eat hay"
Me ~ "That is right"
continues on with other animals for a bit (duck, cat, bird, and then cow.....)
Super C ~ "If I were a cow, then I would make milk."
Me ~ "So what does that make Mommy?"
Super C ~ "A COW!!!" (Laughing follows from both of us)

That boy, he makes me smile..... a lot!

1st Time Out

So Sweet A had her first time out today. Over the past few weeks she has definitely began testing boundaries in a very small way, but all the same, she is not so keen to listening to "no" being told to her! :)

While we were playing outside this afternoon, she kept running out into the street. For the life of me, I can not remember how we taught Super C to not do this, so I decided to give time out a try. To my surprise, Sweet A handled it GREAT....in fact she was smiling and laughing the whole time. (ugh!)

She sat there so nicely and would look at me (I could only see from the corner of my eye) and then slowly lift herself up. I sat her back down a few times and was greeted with a BIG GRIN (mind you, this was all within about 40 seconds). After the third time of sitting her back down, I went to get her out of time out and while talking to her about why she was in time out, I asked her if she understood (yeah right!)....so she lifted her shirt and poked her belly button....laughing even more. After a big hug and little dance, she was back at playing.

I would say it was successful! Or at least not a big ordeal....just one more thing that she does that makes us smile.

And then something to SMILE at!

So, through my emotions today, I laughed a lot! A phrase to sum up my afternoon...

Monkey See....Monkey Do!

Super C and Sweet A have become quite the duo. I have learned that if I want both kids to go upstairs, I just ask Super C to lead them up the stairs and Sweet A will quickly follow. This evening during bath they were practically playing a game of "copy cat." After washing Super C, I went to wash Sweet A and did not have to instruct her on standing up, sitting down, etc....she did the motions just as Super C had done them!

It is awesome to see them slowly enjoy playing together, making themselves laugh, and loving each other. (side note - yes we still have plenty of the "Sweet A is pulling my hair!" or from Sweet A saying "NOOOOOOO!!!") This is a nice glance though at hopefully the friendship and love they will grow to have for each other. I just hope Super C likes being copied for the rest of his life! :)

New Adventures

Today marked a new adventure for me. One that I know the Lord will bless and bring joy from. It feels refreshing to have followed the instruction that the Lord has been telling me. I won't lie, I cried when I made the decision to embark on this new adventure and I even cried when I informed others of this turn in my life. Although, they are not tears of sadness, well maybe a few, but rather tears of joy, gratitude, and appreciation.

It's no secret that as we grow and enter new phases in life, we will leave certain experiences in our past. Of course it is apart of life, although sometimes it can be difficult. My faith is in the Lord that he truly KNOWS and CARES about what is best for myself and my family. I look forward to the new experiences that are to come and the memories that are to be made. For those will be a reminder to me that the process to enter into news areas of life are worth every tear.

Neighborhood Mom

There comes a time in everyone's life that they realize they have grown up. While I'm sure that I have had this moment many times over, today it happened again! I have decided that like it or not, I am the Neighborhood Mom. Now, this title holds the responsibility of having enough balls (soccer, football, basketball, baseball, etc) to go around for all 8 boys on my one little street. It also requires me to have enough fruit snacks and juice boxes available for a "break time" from playing.

I do enjoy this "responsibility" because in the end, I have to be outside either way if Super C and Sweet A want to play out front. As a side note, it does make me wonder at what age the kids will be when I am okay with letting them play out front without me....16 is a good age for that right? :)

Today while we were out front playing, the boys (ranging in age from 3-10) decided to play football...Super C being one of them. Now, Super C KNOWS what football is and says daily that he will be a football player for TX A&M, but when it comes to him actually playing it, he hasn't the slightest clue as what to do.

The boys decided to play tag football (thank goodness) in the street (oh yeah, Super C now gets to run and play in the street....WHAT?). So, they were hiking the ball and then passing it or running with it....Super C just chased whoever had the ball. (I laughed) Then when someone would get a touchdown, he would say "No, I don't think that is a touchdown". (Again, I laughed) My initial thought was that the boys would get annoyed with Super C playing like this (but wait.... his mom has the snacks and toys. Just kidding, I hadn't brought those out yet). So, I was helping Sweet A with a toy when I look up to see all the boys cheering Super C on while he ran passed each of them "so fast" and scored a TOUCHDOWN!!! He was SO HAPPY and the boys were genuinely happy for him.

It made me (and my heart) smile. All of the neighborhood kids that were playing come from a single parent home. 3 of them do not have dads around and their moms are always gone (thus why they are always at their Grandmother's house....our neighbor). Even though I could find the reasons why it bothers me to "have to watch" kids that aren't even mine, instead I decide to be thankful that I can help them have a great afternoon...even if it is just for 1 hour.

Then came the fruit snacks and juice boxes! :)

The Big Red Barn

Do you have this wonderfully written children's book? It really is a fun book to read and Super C has enjoyed reading it for the past few years. Tonight though while reading it, he became a very good narrator. He was doing a great job throughout the entire book. We came to this one page that has a Mama Cat with her babies running after her and then a Mama Dog with her babies walking next to her. As I finish reading the words on the page, Super C puts his finger on the page with the Mama Dog and says (while pointing at the exact location) "Look! That Mama Dog can feed her babies too!" (Implying that it is the same as how I can feed Sweet A) I just couldn't help it, I laughed....out loud. He was right, and I could not tell him that he was 1 bit wrong about that statement. I will never be able to read that book in the same manor. :)